Sunday, May 29, 2011
After a big fat Clomid disappointment in April, Brett and I decided to take a month off from the fertility game. I realize that "game" makes light of this situation and implies some fun to be had. Nevertheless I had one month left in my undergraduate program and felt that finals mixed with family coming for my graduation was more than enough stress without adding Clomid craziness. I have to admit, taking a break from crazy Clomid Kendra makes me very hesitant to start back again. Today is day 1 of this cycle and we have our first appointment with the RE in two weeks. I'm just anxious about what his plan will be and whether or not he will recommend something different for us. I feel like I am at the point where I am beginning to lose hope. If not hope, then will. I want to be a mother more than anything, but I have to wonder when it has already taken so much, if it is meant to be. I look at some of our married friends who have children and they take the kids for granted and have miserable marriages. I know that each relationship is different and it is not necessarily the fact that they have children that has made a mess of their marriages, but Brett is the most important person in my life and I have been worrying lately if God is trying to tell us something. Maybe He is helping us to build a stronger foundation so that we can have a lasting marriage. Brett thinks that my finishing school will take some stress off my plate and we will suddenly get pregnant. He is the eternal optimist, but I have my doubts. I DON'T THINK STRESS HAS A DARN THING TO DO WITH IT!!!!
Posted by Kendra at 11:45 AM