Thursday, August 18, 2011

Will It Last?

I don't know if anyone is even reading this blog, but my intent in creating it was not only to help others, but to help myself. This blog not only provides a space for catharsis of emotions that this process has produced but also a space for creativity. I am innately a very stressed out, neurotic, obsessive, controlling personality. I am constantly overthinking every second of my life. This blog has given me a space to voice these emotions/fears/stresses without worry. I can send thoughts out into the world so that they no longer torment me.

That said, I feel as though I have found a space of peace in my life, mind, soul and body...but how long will it last? I'm always looking at tomorrow and wondering what it will bring, and this is no different. Even when I'm happy and everything is wonderful, I'm waiting for the bottom to fall out. I wish I wasn't this way. I don't think we can change who we are, but I do believe we can change how we think! So I pledge to myself that I will continue on a road of peace and strength. When I begin to doubt myself and my decisions, I will remind myself that God has a plan for me and He can make overnight changes! I can't look to the world (ie. doctors, shopping, vacations, things...) for peace, I have to find it in God, in myself.

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