A friend and I were having a conversation a few weeks ago about all of our irrational worrying and how it causes so much unnecessary stress in our lives. She is a person who stresses about everything as it happens (in the moment stresser) and I am always worrying about what may happen tomorrow or next week or next month or next year. So here I am, about 8 days away from AF (spotting away any tiny hope of a BFP), and I'm worrying about it. What can I possibly do to keep it from coming? NOTHING. Is there anything in my power that will control how horribly incapacitating my cramps are? NO. So why the heck am I worried about it? BECAUSE IT'S WHAT I DO.
I have heard about changing your thought patterns and breaking habits, and I've tried it too, but never really committed to it. So in order to continue seeking the peace that I know is possible for me, I am going to focus on changing my habits. Every time I begin to think that I CAN'T DO THIS, WHAT WILL HAPPEN IF, HOW WILL I REACT, I am going to shut it down and give it to God.
"So never worry about tomorrow, because tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." - Matthew 6:34
“If you have fear of some pain or suffering, you should examine whether there is anything you can do about it. If you can, there is no need to worry about it; if you cannot do anything, then there is also no need to worry.” - Dalai Lama
I hope this will encourage you, not discourage you: I tried to change my thought patterns for a long time, weeks then months, but then, all at once, I realized that it really was working and I was able to not think about the bad things, sometimes without even noticing. After that realization, I just felt better and better. I will admit, this was for infidelity, but I'm having success for infertility too now. So please, just stick it out for a while!
ReplyDeleteThank you April! It really is encouraging to know that it has worked for you!! I'm actually already seeing little changes in my attitude towards things that used to make me crazy...but then again there are good days and bad days and AF hasn't come to town yet this month. I shall stick it out! xoxo
ReplyDeleteGood to hear!! I'm rooting for you!!
ReplyDeleteI have tried many times to change my thought patterns, but use to fail.
ReplyDeleteOne thing I found really helped was I gave myself permission to have those thoughts, but only for a limited amount of time.
I would allow myself to wallow in sadness for 12 hours after AF arrived, and then I would look at my list of things that were positive in my life so that I could move on.
Happy ICLW
#27
I'm here from ICLW. Gret post! I'm an obsessive worrier too. It's gotten much worse during my IF journey. I try to remind myself that there's no point, but it's hard to control it.
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